Weasel Breweries™ Recipes:
Pearl Harbor Pilsner™

New and Improved!

Back Label Text:
Slanty-eyed yellow devils beware! This is American Beer! This ain't none of yer commie gook rice crap! Yeah! This one's made with top flight Kraut barley and hops, Pollack yeast, and the best water those frog bastards up in Canada can put in a bottle! I mean, who the hell won the damn war anyway? Why don't you just get yer butts on back to Russia where you belong, you sneak-attackin, bomb-droppin, kamikaze'in, raw fish-eatin, irradiated yeller fiends! Brewed on 7 December 1997, this pilsner is a paranoid, jingoistic Full Metal Hoopajoop from those xenophobic ol' Monks of Ann Arbor Abbey.

Extract and partial mash. A solid Czech-style pilsner with a scary label. Makes 5 gallons. Elapsed time: 1.5 hours.

  • 5 lbs. Breiss Light dry malt extract
  • 2.5 lbs. Light Guajillo Honey
  • 1 lb. cracked Crystal Malt
  • 0.5 lb. cracked Victory Malt
  • 3 oz. pelleted Saaz hops (bittering, flavoring)
  • 1 oz. pelleted Hallertau hops (aroma)
  • 1 tsp. Irish Moss (optional)
  • 0.5 tsp. Yeast nutrient (optional)
  • 0.5 tsp. Chillguard (optional)
  • 1 package liquid Czech Pilsner Yeast - Wyeast #2278 Czech Pilsner Yeast

In a 30 liter stainless steel brew pot, bring 20 liters cold water to a boil.

Meanwhile, add 5 liters cold water to a 20 liter stainless steel sparge pot. Place specialty grains in muslin or nylon sparging bag and add to water. Begin heating. When temperature reaches 180 F, turn off heat and sparge grains for an additional five minutes. Then, remove bag and squeeze remaining tasty goodness from bag using a collander and a large bowl. Discard grains.

When brew pot reaches boil, begin stirring water and add malt extract. Stirring will prevent the malt extract settling to the bottom of the bot and burning. Next, add the contents of the sparging pot. Stir a few more times for good measure. Inhale.

Turn on the heat and bring the mixture to a boil again. When boiling, the mixture forms a foam layer which can rise out of the pot and burn on your stove. Be careful to avoid this. It is messy and difficult to clean.

Boil the wort for 60 minutes, adding ingredients at the following intervals:

Start of boil: Bittering hops - 1.5 oz. Saaz

45 minutes: Flavoring hops - 1.5 oz. Saaz, Irish Moss, Yeast nutrient

55 minutes: Aroma hops - 1.0 oz. Hallertau

60 minutes: Stop boil.

Cool the wort to 85 F or lower before adding yeast. Cool the wort as quickly as possible to prevent infection. Transfer wort to primary fermenter. Leave primary fermenter at approximately 70F for 12 hours, then lower temperature to primary fermentation temperature of 54 F. After fermentation subsides, approximately 7 to 10 days later, raise temperature to diacetyl rest temp. of 60 F.

After diacetyl rest, lagers generally require no secondary fermentation, due to highly flocculant nature of yeast. Commence bottling. After bottling, lager bottled Pearl Harbor Pilsner at 34 F for at least two months. Age to taste. (Weasel Breweries recommends a minimum of two months. More is often better.)

1st brewing 7 December 1997.
2nd brewing 1 May 1999.

To comment, complain or confess, send email to the Monks of Ann Arbor Abbey.

Copyright © 1997-2011 Kirk R. Humphries and Sandy Marshall. All rights reserved. Weasel Breweries, Monks of Ann Arbor Abbey, and Old Pyehole are trademarks of Kirk Humphries and Sandy Marshall. And so is a lot of other stuff. So there.

Last update: 29 August 2011